God is incredible.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Belated 4 Month Anniversary, Safe arrival to Miami, Visas, & Many spiritual things in between
The 12th marked yet another momentous occasion here in Bolivia (However, I am writting this from Florida). 4 months in Bolivia! How incredible. The best part is that this last month proved to be even more of a challenge than the previous months.
Month 4 Highlights:
-Beginning to work at Carchipampa Christian School full time. I teach elementary (grades 1-6) Art and PE. All those summers of Camp Counseling have paid off
-Officially beginning small groups at CIC. My small group is a group of young women from ages 12-15 ish
-Succesful wisdom teeth removal
-I extended my trip by 5 months (My new come home date will be early to mid june after school is out)
As many of you have heard or read, I had to head back to the States for 12 days in hopes of fixing my visa and returning quickly. I arrived safely after quite a few hectic days of travel. I am currently staying with Aunt Suzi and Uncle Tony in Florida. Staying here has been a blessing in so many ways. Allowing me to stay with them for such a long time and their wonderful hospitality (And the pool doesn't hurt :) ) Admist a bit of turmoil in my visa process and in spiritual frustrations I have found great strength in the oppurtunity to relax, refresh, and begin to refocus on ministry in Bolivia.
As for my visa. Well, that is a tale that I am nervous to tell. Upon arriving, getting a visa seemed nearly impossible. Everyone around me expressed their doubts and concerns, in right. However, upon leaving Bolivia, those closest to me were in prayer that God would give me people along the way, in this process, to guide me. God has been incredibly faithful in this request. When I called the embassy in DC on Monday, I recieved wonderful news about my visa and sent my application out that afternoon. A few ups and downs later, I think the end is in sight. I was told today, Wednesday, that my visa was in route back to me here in FL. However, please keep in mind and prayer that a number of things could still go wrong with my visa and so this is not yet a guarantee. Yet, if I recieve my passport tomorrow and all is well, I imagine you will find quite a joyous blog by mid-day tomorrow :)
What does this all mean for my faith? This may possibly be the most honest blog I have written, as this has been the greatest struggle I have faced since arriving in Bolivia. All of you have been present in my process in getting to Bolivia this last May. I spent the better part of the year being mentored by Pastor Judy, Paul, Rich, and the staff at NP. I spent a great deal of time fundraising and working to raise funds to support my stay. And I spent the most time, in deep prayer. The process was not easy, not then nor in retrospect, however there was not a doubt in my mind that this was exactly where God was calling me.
Why then, a short four months into my stay did things begin to shift? Several times in the last month I have come across the verse "God giveth and God taketh away." And so when this issue of returning to the states to fix my visa rose, I was pretty sure God was preparing me to not return. As political tensions rose I was certain that God was preparing my heat to return to Chicago. Goodness was I angry. And confused.
I love Bolivia. I love being a servant there. But what was it all for? God-certainly. But my focus was lost. (This is where the brutal honesty comes in...) Although I continued to serve God and continued to think of myself as a disciple, I found myself farther and farther from why I came. And when Bolivia was being taken from me, I suddenly did not want to serve in Chicago. I have grown to understand and love God deeper in the last few months than I have in my life. Yet, why was I serving? The night Andrea and I arrived in Bolivia we laid in bed talking about the day we would arrive back in the states. The way that our families would embrace us and the stories we would tell. Suddenly, I was back in Miami and I was alone in many forms of the word. This was not the plan.
In retrospect, God has given me several oppurtunities to learn this lesson in the last four months. Three times, that come to mind, God has 'said' to me "fully rely on Me." And I thought I was. When my Aunt had surgery a few months ago now, I found myself leaving camp early driving over an hour to the closest phone only to nearly yell at my Uncle for his lack of communication. Where was my faith? I knew she was in God's hands. I knew he was caring for her. Yet, some how that was not enough. Sadly, I have more tales just the same. Which brings me to Miami.
I have been stripped of all of my securities. And finally, I have no choice, but to FULLY rely on God. When everyone around me was saying how impossible getting back to Bolivia was, God said no it was not. And so for four days, I prayed. I prayed in a way I haven't in years.
When I moved in with Aunt Debbie and Uncle Bob almost 7 years ago no longer did I think I NEEDed God in the way that I do. I had friends and family taking care of me. But I am not in Bolivia to serve my friends, my family, my church, my college, my home. Simply my God. God literally stripped me back to the basics. Brought me away from my distractions and even away from my servitude (Even after all those sermons on Sabbath at F.U.M. of PR. I still was not even practicing this idea). It was the only way I could hear. And boy, have things become clear.
Not a day goes by that I do not think and pray for each of you. I miss home quite often. But this year is more than that. It's about shaping my future and the future of those in my life. It's about being a leader and a servant. By no means do I think I have figured any of this out, but it is certainly much more clear.
I have been faithfully reading Psalm 46 as prescribed by a dear friend and leader in my life in Bolivia.
Month 4 Highlights:
-Beginning to work at Carchipampa Christian School full time. I teach elementary (grades 1-6) Art and PE. All those summers of Camp Counseling have paid off
-Officially beginning small groups at CIC. My small group is a group of young women from ages 12-15 ish
-Succesful wisdom teeth removal
-I extended my trip by 5 months (My new come home date will be early to mid june after school is out)
As many of you have heard or read, I had to head back to the States for 12 days in hopes of fixing my visa and returning quickly. I arrived safely after quite a few hectic days of travel. I am currently staying with Aunt Suzi and Uncle Tony in Florida. Staying here has been a blessing in so many ways. Allowing me to stay with them for such a long time and their wonderful hospitality (And the pool doesn't hurt :) ) Admist a bit of turmoil in my visa process and in spiritual frustrations I have found great strength in the oppurtunity to relax, refresh, and begin to refocus on ministry in Bolivia.
As for my visa. Well, that is a tale that I am nervous to tell. Upon arriving, getting a visa seemed nearly impossible. Everyone around me expressed their doubts and concerns, in right. However, upon leaving Bolivia, those closest to me were in prayer that God would give me people along the way, in this process, to guide me. God has been incredibly faithful in this request. When I called the embassy in DC on Monday, I recieved wonderful news about my visa and sent my application out that afternoon. A few ups and downs later, I think the end is in sight. I was told today, Wednesday, that my visa was in route back to me here in FL. However, please keep in mind and prayer that a number of things could still go wrong with my visa and so this is not yet a guarantee. Yet, if I recieve my passport tomorrow and all is well, I imagine you will find quite a joyous blog by mid-day tomorrow :)
What does this all mean for my faith? This may possibly be the most honest blog I have written, as this has been the greatest struggle I have faced since arriving in Bolivia. All of you have been present in my process in getting to Bolivia this last May. I spent the better part of the year being mentored by Pastor Judy, Paul, Rich, and the staff at NP. I spent a great deal of time fundraising and working to raise funds to support my stay. And I spent the most time, in deep prayer. The process was not easy, not then nor in retrospect, however there was not a doubt in my mind that this was exactly where God was calling me.
Why then, a short four months into my stay did things begin to shift? Several times in the last month I have come across the verse "God giveth and God taketh away." And so when this issue of returning to the states to fix my visa rose, I was pretty sure God was preparing me to not return. As political tensions rose I was certain that God was preparing my heat to return to Chicago. Goodness was I angry. And confused.
I love Bolivia. I love being a servant there. But what was it all for? God-certainly. But my focus was lost. (This is where the brutal honesty comes in...) Although I continued to serve God and continued to think of myself as a disciple, I found myself farther and farther from why I came. And when Bolivia was being taken from me, I suddenly did not want to serve in Chicago. I have grown to understand and love God deeper in the last few months than I have in my life. Yet, why was I serving? The night Andrea and I arrived in Bolivia we laid in bed talking about the day we would arrive back in the states. The way that our families would embrace us and the stories we would tell. Suddenly, I was back in Miami and I was alone in many forms of the word. This was not the plan.
In retrospect, God has given me several oppurtunities to learn this lesson in the last four months. Three times, that come to mind, God has 'said' to me "fully rely on Me." And I thought I was. When my Aunt had surgery a few months ago now, I found myself leaving camp early driving over an hour to the closest phone only to nearly yell at my Uncle for his lack of communication. Where was my faith? I knew she was in God's hands. I knew he was caring for her. Yet, some how that was not enough. Sadly, I have more tales just the same. Which brings me to Miami.
I have been stripped of all of my securities. And finally, I have no choice, but to FULLY rely on God. When everyone around me was saying how impossible getting back to Bolivia was, God said no it was not. And so for four days, I prayed. I prayed in a way I haven't in years.
When I moved in with Aunt Debbie and Uncle Bob almost 7 years ago no longer did I think I NEEDed God in the way that I do. I had friends and family taking care of me. But I am not in Bolivia to serve my friends, my family, my church, my college, my home. Simply my God. God literally stripped me back to the basics. Brought me away from my distractions and even away from my servitude (Even after all those sermons on Sabbath at F.U.M. of PR. I still was not even practicing this idea). It was the only way I could hear. And boy, have things become clear.
Not a day goes by that I do not think and pray for each of you. I miss home quite often. But this year is more than that. It's about shaping my future and the future of those in my life. It's about being a leader and a servant. By no means do I think I have figured any of this out, but it is certainly much more clear.
I have been faithfully reading Psalm 46 as prescribed by a dear friend and leader in my life in Bolivia.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Details about Miami
It's finally official, I am really heading to Miami.
9/14/08: I will leave Bolivia at 11am and arrive in Miami at 5.30pm
9/25/08 I will leave Miami at 11.20p and arrive in Miami at 6am
Thankfully I am able to stay with my Aunt and Uncle in Florida while I am getting all of my visa settled.
Although things are quickly falling into place there are still a number of concerns in my travels. Both in my departure and in my arrival. Over the next 3 weeks, please keep me intently in your prayers.
I'll update as soon as I arrive in Miami. Thank you for the love and support.
9/14/08: I will leave Bolivia at 11am and arrive in Miami at 5.30pm
9/25/08 I will leave Miami at 11.20p and arrive in Miami at 6am
Thankfully I am able to stay with my Aunt and Uncle in Florida while I am getting all of my visa settled.
Although things are quickly falling into place there are still a number of concerns in my travels. Both in my departure and in my arrival. Over the next 3 weeks, please keep me intently in your prayers.
I'll update as soon as I arrive in Miami. Thank you for the love and support.
Friday, September 5, 2008
I'm heading to Miami -Just for a bit
My loves at home
Forgive me for this information being on facebook, however I feel this is the best way to reach the greatest number of support at home. At some point today, I will also be updating my blog for those of you keeping up with that.
There are a number of changes that have occurred in the last month and I am sorry for my lack of communication home with these changes. I was waiting for things to settle before I passed many of these on. However, this week has taken a different turn.
Since arriving I have heard God more clear than I have in my life. Living here without distraction and living in God to the fullest, everyday, has created a very open line of communication. The message I hear most frequently is no different than I was home. "Have faith." And rightfully so, who is a missionary without faith? I am at that point again. I am fully relying on God. He has called me to Bolivia for a purpose. He did not call me here to leave me. He called me in service, discipleship, and faith.
I am no longer a part of International Teams. I am praying that I am still able to be a part of their ministries but no longer did I feel I could confidently represent them with all that I am. God has reassured me of this decision each day since I have made it. I am living with the Youngblood's, the family that I have adopted here and spent so much time with previously. Currently, Rehanna, another missionary looking for housing, also lives here. We live in a village and I love it.
This week I officially started working at Carchipampa Christian School. It is an international school that focuses on both the future and the important. Each of the teachers are missionaries who have a pure passion to lead and serve. I have been teaching elementary art and PE. Words could hardly begin to express how much the children and I love one and other. Each morning the staff has daily devotionals, the students have chapel once a week, and there is not a moment that goes by that someone at Carchi isn't praying for the well being of the staff and students. It is incredible.
Upon arrival in May, I found out that I came down with the wrong visa. This is an error that occurred in the states due to a miscommuncation between International Teams and myself. In order for me to continue to work at Carchipampa, I need to be legal here in Bolivia. Normally, this would mean a 'border run.' However, the US is in deeper than ever with the Bolivian Government and I have been told I have to fly to Miami to fix this. This is where my faith is coming in. I have to do this within three weeks.
Rehanna's faith blows me away each day. When I told her of this issue, through my tears :) , she reminded me that all I can do is ask for support and prayer and God will do everything else. And so I go to you. My faithful friends and family who have supported me since I arrived back home last year.
My prayer needs:
-Peace and confirmation that God needs me at Carchipampa
-Confidence to fly to Miami and strength to return
-The $2900 of financial support that is needed to correct this visa error and to fly to Miami
-Wisdom, Strength, and Courage in my faith.
The desire to fix my visa is not only out of fear of deportation and calling to work at Carchipampa, but also in the fact that I am staying in Bolivia until June. I had been prayful about this idea for quite some time and recently received great confirmation in this. (Dont worry Rach, Ill be home BEFORE your wedding!!) My family and I have agreed that this is the best time for me to continue in ministry here. I am here and I have built great relationships. Today, ironically, marks my halfway mark. Well, if I were to have left in December. To think that, is astonishing. I am JUST now, becoming comfortable in my surroundings and in my relational ministries. However, staying until June means that I am only a quarter of the way done here.
God is faithful to me. Day in and Day out. Not a day goes by that the sun does not rise over the mountains here in Bolivia. Why do I then, doubt?
"Greater things have yet to come
Great things are still to be done
In this city
Greater things are still to come
And greater things are still to be done here"
-Chris Tomlin Song GOD OF THIS CITY
Forgive me for this information being on facebook, however I feel this is the best way to reach the greatest number of support at home. At some point today, I will also be updating my blog for those of you keeping up with that.
There are a number of changes that have occurred in the last month and I am sorry for my lack of communication home with these changes. I was waiting for things to settle before I passed many of these on. However, this week has taken a different turn.
Since arriving I have heard God more clear than I have in my life. Living here without distraction and living in God to the fullest, everyday, has created a very open line of communication. The message I hear most frequently is no different than I was home. "Have faith." And rightfully so, who is a missionary without faith? I am at that point again. I am fully relying on God. He has called me to Bolivia for a purpose. He did not call me here to leave me. He called me in service, discipleship, and faith.
I am no longer a part of International Teams. I am praying that I am still able to be a part of their ministries but no longer did I feel I could confidently represent them with all that I am. God has reassured me of this decision each day since I have made it. I am living with the Youngblood's, the family that I have adopted here and spent so much time with previously. Currently, Rehanna, another missionary looking for housing, also lives here. We live in a village and I love it.
This week I officially started working at Carchipampa Christian School. It is an international school that focuses on both the future and the important. Each of the teachers are missionaries who have a pure passion to lead and serve. I have been teaching elementary art and PE. Words could hardly begin to express how much the children and I love one and other. Each morning the staff has daily devotionals, the students have chapel once a week, and there is not a moment that goes by that someone at Carchi isn't praying for the well being of the staff and students. It is incredible.
Upon arrival in May, I found out that I came down with the wrong visa. This is an error that occurred in the states due to a miscommuncation between International Teams and myself. In order for me to continue to work at Carchipampa, I need to be legal here in Bolivia. Normally, this would mean a 'border run.' However, the US is in deeper than ever with the Bolivian Government and I have been told I have to fly to Miami to fix this. This is where my faith is coming in. I have to do this within three weeks.
Rehanna's faith blows me away each day. When I told her of this issue, through my tears :) , she reminded me that all I can do is ask for support and prayer and God will do everything else. And so I go to you. My faithful friends and family who have supported me since I arrived back home last year.
My prayer needs:
-Peace and confirmation that God needs me at Carchipampa
-Confidence to fly to Miami and strength to return
-The $2900 of financial support that is needed to correct this visa error and to fly to Miami
-Wisdom, Strength, and Courage in my faith.
The desire to fix my visa is not only out of fear of deportation and calling to work at Carchipampa, but also in the fact that I am staying in Bolivia until June. I had been prayful about this idea for quite some time and recently received great confirmation in this. (Dont worry Rach, Ill be home BEFORE your wedding!!) My family and I have agreed that this is the best time for me to continue in ministry here. I am here and I have built great relationships. Today, ironically, marks my halfway mark. Well, if I were to have left in December. To think that, is astonishing. I am JUST now, becoming comfortable in my surroundings and in my relational ministries. However, staying until June means that I am only a quarter of the way done here.
God is faithful to me. Day in and Day out. Not a day goes by that the sun does not rise over the mountains here in Bolivia. Why do I then, doubt?
"Greater things have yet to come
Great things are still to be done
In this city
Greater things are still to come
And greater things are still to be done here"
-Chris Tomlin Song GOD OF THIS CITY
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